Many of the clients who come to see me are craving empowerment. They don’t tend to call it empowerment, but more like a desire for more passion and inspiration, to feel more confident, to live a centered and balanced life. It shows up in many forms, but the common underlying theme is a desire to live an empowered life.
One of the big reasons we don’t tend to stand in our empowerment and OWN our lives, is that we are disembodied. We live in our heads instead of living in our whole bodies so we are cut off from where empowerment is actually sourced from. Empowerment comes from a place of being embodied. There is a deep feminine wisdom that can only be accessed through the body. When you are all wrapped up in your thoughts, trying to figure it all out, you are literally cut off from your body wisdom.
There is a huge movement right now on the planet that is calling us to heal the Divine Feminine within ourselves and on the planet. The access point is the body. We have to learn how to find our way back into our bodies so we can get in touch with our innate wisdom. It is from that embodied place that we can know ourselves.
What am I referring to when I speak of Divine Feminine wisdom? I am speaking of a wisdom that has been suppressed from 5,000 years of a patriarchy. Divine Feminine is body centered wisdom. Divine Feminine wisdom is more right brained than left brained. It’s our creativity, our sensuality, our sensitivity and emotional body. We access it through our senses which you are cut off from when you are living in your head. Feminine wisdom is what we access when we meditate. It is found only in the present. It is felt. It is sensed. It is a profound deep knowingness that is available in all of us. When you are embodied and owning your Divine Feminine power, you are not confused. You are not overwhelmed. You are not lost. You are not insecure. You are not looking outside for something to fill a need.
You are centered. You are whole. You are badass.
In order to gain access to this wisdom, you must be in your body and not all tangled up in your mind. Emotion is a wonderful tool for climbing back into your body. We have been trained in our culture to avoid our emotions, when they are actually the key pointing us to freedom.
I want to walk you through a simple process of accessing your power through emotion. You may have some resistance at first and that’s okay. In fact, as I have said over and over again, your ego mind will resist any effort that you make to grow so bear with me.
To demonstrate this process, I want to use something that might trigger an intense emotional response. Let’s say someone attacks you in some way. Whether it’s a stranger yelling at you in traffic, or someone you love is blaming or shaming you. If you are sensitive, like me, something like this could throw you off your game. You might start creating a story in your head about this other person. You may start trying to figure out why someone would do such a thing. You might feel defensive and start attacking the other person outright or in your mind. You will feel as if you’re suffering.
Or maybe you have a deep spiritual practice and an understanding that this person is clearly projecting and it’s not about you. Whatever the case, it is still energy that is being hurled at you and unless you are the “chosen one” like Neo in the Matrix, you are probably going to feel it on some level.
Telling yourself, “this is not about me” is very helpful and will help you maintain your center as you do the work to empower yourself with it. I love this because it’s like a martial art where you are using the negative energy for a positive purpose.
When you are being attacked in some way, there is energy coming at you and it then becomes your job to help that energy move right along.
You may be thinking, “if it’s not about me, why is it my job to do anything at all?” Well,
it is your choice to not do anything at all, but in my experience, it’s the most painful route. If you feel the attack on any level, it’s affecting you and if you fail to create a healthy path for that energy to flow, it will have its way with you. It is actually energy that can get caught in your body for long periods of time. This type of energy is not meant to be stored, it’s meant to keep on moving. Sooner or later, storing all of that energy will take its toll. Sitting in the body, that energy can get stored as unexpressed emotion that builds (which is where things like road rage come from). It can even end up causing unexplained pain or medical issues. Trust me, it’s way better to do the simple work of releasing it right away and using the process as a way of climbing back in your body and owning your Divine Feminine Power.
Here’s a simple practice that can be performed in less than 15 minutes. Pay close attention and take it in. This practice is sure to lead you back into your power.
The way to do this is through expressing the emotion fully and then when you are complete, get up and dance. That’s the gist of it!! Deeply feel your emotions and get them out in whatever way suits you. Maybe it would feel like a release to cry or to yell and beat pillows. When you are complete, put on some music and dance yourself into your body. Move the way your body wants to move.
Now I want to share with you my most recent opportunity to practice what I preach and what inspired me to talk about this today.
It was Mother’s Day this weekend and I was prepared to really celebrate myself for almost 25 years of mothering my daughter as well as a lifetime of mothering myself. I was all geared up and ready to indulge in a day of goodness and then I received a message that was clearly a projection, but came in the form of a brutal attack. I looked at it and immediately knew that I did not want this. It was like someone handed me a plate of caca (yuck, no thank you). I was aware enough to know this wasn’t about me, but it still hurt.
I couldn’t just delete the message and not give it another thought because I knew it would still be sitting inside of me somewhere and I didn’t want to keep any part of it. The energy had made its way in and now it was my job to give it a pathway out.
I told my husband, “Babe, this hurts, I gotta process this.” He held me through my tears and howls. He’s so good at this. When I get into it, I can really get into it, because I don’t want any part of it sticking around so I am motivated to get it out. When I felt complete, I turned on some Nina Simone and I danced my power back on! When the song was over, I felt whole, centered, at peace and ready to own my day. And I went on to have an amazing Mother’s Day. That process took all of 10 minutes. It doesn’t take long to feel it when you really allow yourself to just release into it. Then put some music on that inspires you to climb back in your body. Personally, I prefer something slow and sultry then I work my way into something more upbeat and inspiring. By the end, I feel AMAZING!
And that is how it’s done. You express it and then liberate yourself in the process. You free yourself from being a victim of someone else’s attack. It was never yours, but if it’s coming at you and you feel it, you gotta tend to it because some part of you is taking it on and I promise, you do not want it!
Allow the emotion to flow through you by expressing it and once it is all out, you digest the powerful work you just did by dancing yourself back into your body.
Animals will shake out a traumatic event and then go right back to what they were doing before, eating grass or whatever.
I am not sure if I have told you this before, but my dog doesn’t like to be home by herself, EVER. She gets anxious if you leave her alone for even a couple of hours. As soon as we get home, she will cry really loud like she is emoting her feelings for about two minutes then she will shake really good, and afterwards, she is fine.
It’s just like that. Animals intuitively know to move that emotion through and out. We have become less wild, too civilized for emoting so we stuff it inside and it becomes pain or sickness in the body. That stuff has gotta move!
As women, this is how we truly step into our power. We do it through expressing our emotions. Society has done a bang up job in shutting our power down. We have been taught that there is something bad or wrong with expressing our emotions freely, so we learned to hide it or stuff it down. In the process, we abandoned the avenue to our power. Have you ever noticed how much lighter and grounded you feel after a good cry? Just imagine if you were to put on some music and allow yourself to really revel in that good feeling after bawling your eyes out. Pretty good, right? Well you won’t really know until you try it.
If you already find it easy to access and express your emotions, great! Try adding some dancing afterwards to help you fully shed that story that was keeping you from your power. This is a process of rebirthing yourself. You can literally use every emotional storm as an opportunity to release baggage that you have been carrying around for years!
It’s next level to have a witness affirming your process. Whether it is with a buddy, a coach, or a group setting like a retreat. To be seen in your transformation solidifies the whole experience. We are not here to go it alone. Believe me, I tried to go it alone for years. We need each other to heal and transform. It’s so easy to discount your own process, so it’s essential to have at least one person on your team, affirming you in your growth.
If you are someone who has difficulty accessing your emotions to express them, I highly recommend getting a life-coach that you resonate with. Someone who can really see you, so you can begin to really see yourself. And here is my offer to you:
If you feel the slightest twinge of curiosity, I invite you to schedule a call with me. It doesn’t cost you anything and who knows where it will lead, but you never know if you don’t try. You can visit my website thelifecoachingspot.com and click the gold button at the bottom of the home page and schedule a time that works for you!
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I look forward to seeing you there.